8th grade is here

A simple email w/ a few words letting me know Reid is ready to register for 8 grade. 8th. Grade. No I'm not sitting here remembering how he was a baby ( he was never really a baby), how he's grown bigger (which..OH MY GOSH..he has) or anything else. I'm thinking of how PROUD I am he's made it this far. This kid, excuse me, young man has beaten so many odds thrown his way. And every time I think he's going to give up..he gets back up. Again..& again. He fights every day to stay home. School is loud, the kids are JERKS & staying home would be safe. Comforting. But every single day he puts on a BRAVE face & goes. I know grown people that call in to work if it rains. (Seriously, I've done that..no judgment here.)

And I know...I know what some people are thinking right now. It's no big deal. And to you or your kid it's probably not. But to MY son..it is SUCH a big deal. To face a huge fear every day. To slay the GIANT every day..is a big freakin deal. Making him get on the bus when his tics are so bad he CANNOT talk, or walk straight..is a big freakin deal. Tourette's is not a forgiving thing. It comes & goes as it pleases..leaving him vulnerable to whatever it decides to do that day. Make him stutter, make him NOT be able to open his mouth at all, twitch so hard he looks like he's having a seizure. Asperger's too. Everything is loud, bright, smells are too strong, clothes actually hurt. All of these things alone would give me every excuse to do nothing. Much less face going to school where (almost) every kid you see has something to say about your issues.

So, several years ago when Reid was diagnosed w/ both of these Syndromes, I had a few questions for his Dr. I asked what he could or couldn't do etc. The Dr. looked at me & said "It's important for you to mourn the loss of what you thought your son would be. Because he WILL not be that kid. He CAN be the best Reid though. And that's pretty damn special." My son did not make the honor roll. He didn't even come close. But he freakin showed up. And he stuck with it. No matter what. And now he's about to be in 8th grade. And that's pretty damn cool.

Brothers

Sometimes during the fighting, tattling, squabbling. bickering mess I wonder if my boys like each other. At. All. I know it's normal, I had 2 brothers. But THREE boys makes for a very intersting dynamic. Someone is always left out. Sometimes by choice, sometimes by default & sometimes because the other 2 are being not so nice. There's no rhyme or reason. So I love when I get absolute proof that they do love each other. It make me so very happy. Like last night when they had a "Brother" meeting. The 3 Musketeers they cried out as they all marched towards Reid's room. Of course they argued over who got to be Porthos but that's normal. It was a very small thing but it made my heart happy.

October

October has been a busy month! Learning new things at school, losing first teeth, field trips, band concerts & of course, Halloween. November usually begins a countdown for me. It's when my internal clock starts letting me know my favorite time of year is here. The Holiday Season has begun!!

Back to school

School is back in session. Which means I'm using my professional juggling skills. (NOT) The year has started off well..so far. Here are a few pics from the first week:

Reagan

Dearest Reagan,

It' been almost 8 years since we got to bring you home from the hospital. I had to fight to keep you safe, in my tummy. Little did I know, I was getting a glimpse of your personality. But you were worth every moment on bed rest, every moment of medication that made me jumpy. You entered the world curious & ready to go. You are the middle son & brother & you are perfect for that role in life. God did well putting you in that spot. Here are just a few things that I love about you:

1. You are the first person up & always happy in the mornings.

2. You were born to run & play. Your body is lean & your athletic ability is awesome to watch.

3. As much as it scares me, your quiet strength & fearlessness is one of my favorite things about you.

4. You are the child that always reminds your brothers to pray before they eat.

5. I love the way you NEVER give up. On anything. You will fall 50 times & get up again & again.   And try just as hard. It is AMAZING to see!!

6. Your sensitivity is a gift. Sometimes I do worry that you get taken advantage of. I take comfort in knowing the Meek shall inherit the earth.

7. I LOVE your SPIRIT. Your heart is full of love for everyone you meet.  You hug everyone & tell them you love them all the time.

8. You are brave. You will try anything at least once.

9. Your fashion sense is so FUN! You care about how you look, what you wear & have fun with it. I love shopping w/ you!!

10. You are so very smart!

11. I love that you love to READ. You always have a book. Trust me, this will serve you well!!

12. You have the coolest hair. It's thick, full & blond. Makes for awesome Mohawks.

13. You put others needs ahead of yours a lot. To be honest, sometimes I wish you would be a little selfish. But that isn't you.

You are the perfect mix of so many things. I will never forget earlier this year when your baseball coaches spoke about you. At first I didn't understand where they were going w/ this speech, but then I understood. "This kid never gave up. In the dugout he was encouraging & always had nice things to say to everyone. He surprised both of us & we weren't prepared at how attached we grew to him. We will miss him.I personally will never forget how he would run off the field win or lose & give me the biggest hug. It doesn't matter how good he is at baseball because he has a big heart." This IS YOU!!!!

35 years

Today I thought about all my blessings. In no particular order: My wonderful, awesome patient hubby that perfectly balances my hyper self, my 3 BOYS that are answers to prayers I never thought to ask for, my cousins that grew up w/ me & know me like no one else, my best friend that is more like the sister I never had, my awesome brothers & their families, my nieces & nephews that are so smart & gorgeous, my awesome Father & Mother-in-law that took me to lunch & made me Birthday pies, friends that left me notes, cards & other funny Birthday greetings. My sister-in-law that took me to lunch today, my Dad,  my Mom, my Aunt that saved the day. Thank you a million times for making my day. And mostly thank God for each one of these gifts.

Boys!

I'm a boy Mom & I had 2 brothers. I've realized lately that to me, this means certain things. I say fart, not toot, poot or gas. As much as you spend on cute, girly clothes & accesories, I spend on food. Seriously. Boys are bottomless pits of energy. This energy comes from the massive amounts of food they consume every hour. I'm also a referee. I have learned that to establish dominance boys will fight to death over a hot wheel, football or pretty much whatever. Luckily it never comes to that.

Boys can learn manners if you start early & often. My boys are not perfect but they know basic manners & use them under threat of the Mom stare. They are always on the hunt. For fun, trouble, food..whatever. Just always on the lookout. A fort will give me exactly 35 minutes of peace. 37 if I can find a flashlight & cookies.  

All boys are tough in their own way. I have a typical tough guy w/ an athletic frame & no fear. I also have a closet tough guy. He seems scared or hesitant until you push him & then you see he's bigger than he seems & tougher than you thought. I have been blessed & sometimes cursed to have the third type. Life has thrown him so many curve balls that he's tougher than any grown man. He's stronger than he thinks & braver than anyone I know.  Together they make the perfect team. Separately they are my one that likes to shop, one that will still cuddle & one that will open up when we drive to get an icee.

Yes, they are messy, crazy, loud, silly, gross & smelly. But they are also sweet, funny, strong, good friends, good brothers & wonderful sons. Sometimes I do envy my friends that have girls & I imagine shopping together, getting pedicures, eating one dinner without a burp or fart. Then I get a HUGE hug that smells like sunshine, sweat, food & boy. I love that smell. I am a boy Mom. I get to build forts, have epic water balloon fights, slap hats on & leave the house in 30 seconds if needed. I'm pretty lucky.